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5/25/2005 3:55:15 PM
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New and Improved Snack Foods

Has anyone else noticed how all sorts of snack foods now-a-days advertise themselves as being "New and Improved"? They just keep making snacks better tasting and better looking. How did people even eat snack foods 30 years ago? They probably tasted like cardboard and looked like a piece of dried up poop. Can you imagine what snack foods are going to taste like in the future? If you could go 50 years into the future you'd probably be blown away by the flavor of snack foods. They'll be so new and improved that you will transcend the normal bounds of taste into some kind of Flavor Nirvana. Have you ever noticed the chicken on the box of Chicken in a Biscuit? That chicken is really happy. If you look at the ingredients of a box of Ckicken in a Biscuit you'll see that there are real pieces of ground up chicken on the cracker. So this chicken on the cover of the box is all excited saying "Eat me! I taste delicious!" Now consider the New and Improved future of Chicken in a Biscuit. I'm sure that cracker technology has already reached it's pinnacle so in order to stay new and improved they're probably going to have to improve the chickens. This is going to leave us with 60 foot tall chickens that shoot lasers out of their eyes. I feel sorry for the scientists working on the New and Improved chicken project. It can't be easy trying to tame 60 foot tall laser chickens. I think that the New and Improved Chicken Project will be the downfall of mankind. In our quest for better tasting, better looking snack foods we will unleash the terror of 60 foot tall laser chickens on humanity. Then they will be running the show. The chickens will probably end up eating us in the end. Human in a Biscuit with a smiling human being on the box. [Edited on 5/25/2005]
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  • Actually I did read the whole post, but I had nothing to say about it.....I thought the subject would be more fun to respond too.....
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  • Chicken it's whats for dinner...unless you can not escape the laser or get mauled by a giant chicken talon! Then it will be known as a GOD!
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  • i read it but as soon as I saw the subject I wanted to post that
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  • Coincidently, obesity in the United States is on the rise. "My God, there is an obesity epidemic!"
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] RENEGADE 89 You are what you eat... I am a -blam!-.[/quote] Well, yo mama's a dick.
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  • God, that was funny. You could have posted "Angelina Jolie is Hot. Do you agree?" And then made a poll about whether or not you've actually readthe post or are an idiot. Hey. That's an idea!
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  • I love how half of the people who have posted a response to this thread only read the Subject and not the Body of the post.
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  • are you calling my a baby?
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] free tibet Humans are made of meat too.[/quote] Yeah, but our purpose here in life isn't to be the source of food for other humans.
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  • lol
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  • You are what you eat... I am a -blam!-.
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] free tibet Humans are made of meat too.[/quote] Then why dont we eat people if they are made of meat??
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  • Humans are made of meat too.
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  • If were not supposed to eat animals, then why are they made of meat?
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  • How can something be new [b]and[/b] improved? It contradicts itself. New means it is a thing that has never been there before, and improved means it is a better version of a previous thing. Gaahaha!
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  • Cafeteria mozzarella sticks. All right.
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  • I am deap dish meat lovers pizza wtf?
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  • This is my greatest fear. I have been a long time advocate against genetic engineering forthe exact reason that 60 foot laser chickens are not a good isea, no matter how tastey Laser Chicken in a Biscuit is. I've also noticed the same "New and Improved" thing with pet foot. I mean, just smell current catfood. What the heck was it like 30 years ago!?! Did they just stick poo in a can?
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  • I must be Chinesee food then.....Cause thats what were having for lunch this afternoon....And yesterday I was a turkey grinder with a bowl of chicken and rice soup.....NICE!
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