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3/23/2005 5:55:22 AM
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I know that forums arn't the BEST place for advice, but...

Anyways, I just found out that my girlfriend cheated on me. She went on a trip to New York and said she slept with someone. What do I do? Do I dump her? Forgive her? I love her more then life itself, and I'm at a loss. I could use some advice. She has told me that it won't happen again and all that garbage... but I don't know. I want to go crawl in a hole and die.
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  • I say, If they cheat on you, they don't really love you. I'd dump her. There is no way you and her could be together for the rest of your life if she has been with someone else. That's my stance on cheating at least. But take forgiveness into consideration if she was piss-drunk.
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  • If my girlfriend did that, I would dump her.
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Griffin Spades Rabid Gnome, in me opinion is don't listen to anyone else from this point on cause every situation is different and that's something you and her gota work out and figure out, people mean good but man sometimes they forget relationships arent a cookie cutter thing.[/quote] Correct. Part of life is being able to make a decision without the help of others. You'll often find that your own ideas are more fitting to your situation and disposition than any advice anyone else could possibly give you.
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  • Rabid Gnome, in me opinion is don't listen to anyone else from this point on cause every situation is different and that's something you and her gota work out and figure out, people mean good but man sometimes they forget relationships arent a cookie cutter thing.
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  • Don't do it. I've been in this -blam!- before and it never ends good.
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  • [i]"Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!"[/i]
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  • If she still wants to stay with you, and if you love her as much as you say, then I say patch it up and put it behind you. I speak from experience when I say you should hang on to anyone who wants to be with you - you don't know how hard it will be to replace them until you try.
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  • in my experience i would say ditch her. even when she told you about it she was still hiding things. but just remember that if she does it to you again you can only blame yourself. i would recommend not putting yourself in that position. but i guess if you can look at her as the same person she was before she cheated (which i wouldn't be able to do) then you could probably give it another try. but like i said, i wouldn't recommend it. edit- i just saw your other post and maybe i'm misreading you. but whatever it is good luck and don't be a chump! :P [Edited on 3/23/2005 8:44:53 AM]
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  • She didn't give me the full story the first time through. I don't think I'm being walked on, but I do have a history of being extremely trusting and taken advantage of.
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  • [i]This[/i] is why... [quote]Chicks are for -blam!-s.[/quote]
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  • I say you give her one more chance, but only if you can tell that she means it when she says, "sorry." Sorry this happened to you.
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Rabid Gnome No, that's not what I'm getting at. Lets just say she went through a lot.[/quote] [i]She[/i] went through a lot? And I guess you didn't? Oh well, since I don't know the whole story I will leave you with this: Don't turn yourself into a doormat, you will we walked all over for the rest of your life.
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  • That is a mess of s situation that you are in Rabid. It sucks that your girl made such a bad decision. There are a few questions you have to ask yourself.... 1.) If you did break up how much time did you put into the relationship and are you willing to give it up now? 2.) Is it worth it to stay with her with the doubt in your mind of weither or not she would do it again. (Because unless you feel you can totally put it behind you it will eat you up inside) 3.) Can you ever [i] really [/i] trust her again? 4.) Do you chose believe and validate whatever ridicilous reason she gives you for her actions? In the end it isn't about her its about you... its YOUR decision if you want to stay around or not. Be SELFISH in your thoughts because hers were totally selfish when she decided to cheat. No one made her to it, she did it on her own and she can not blame this on you. Love is tricky sometimes because it clouds your head, try to think clearly about it and honestly. The most important thing in all of this is that you are real with yourself. All things in life happen for a reason and through the bad times you learn lessons. Thats what makes you the person that you are. Learn something from this, and take it with you in life. Call it women's intuition or whatever you want but there is a lesson to be learned in all of this and I just hope for your sake you find that. You can PM me if you want to talk about it further. I wish you luck Rabid, I hope that this works out the best way it can for your sake. Edit: Dang you guys are quick. I guess this means nothing now. [Edited on 3/23/2005 6:47:53 AM]
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  • No, that's not what I'm getting at. Lets just say she went through a lot.
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Rabid Gnome ...but it turns out she didn't cheat on me, Atleast, not in my oppinion.[/quote] Is your opinion like Bill Clinton's? I'm just kidding, but if she [i]had[/i] really cheated on you, I would have suggested dumping her.
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  • Thanks guys, truly. Uhm, we talked, and we worked things out. I can't say anything about what happened, but it turns out she didn't cheat on me, Atleast, not in my oppinion. As I said, I can't really go into detail as it's not something she wants me to share with anyone yet. Again, thanks for all the advice, especially SBP.
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  • hope it works out alright--either way you play it your setting yourself up for hurt, be it dumping her and getting over it or being cheated on again.. you have to ask yourself if it's worth going through how your feeling again. --I can't provide any advice really as to my knowledge I've never been cheated on--Being ugly does seem to have it's advantages.
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  • well i think SBP covere dit pretty well, but basically it all comes down to if you love he or not and if she loves you, if you both do then work it otu if not then break up. i might be over simplifing here but thats pretty much it.
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  • forgive someone 70 x 7
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  • fuk her in the face, give her pearl necklace, then break up with her.
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  • [color=darkorchid]Lose her. If you let her get away with it even once, she may do it again in the future. If she [i]really[/i] likes you, she will try and get you both back together again. If that happens, then it's all about how much you can trust her.[/color]
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  • Find out where the guy she slept with lives, buy a digital camcorder, fly over there, knock on his door, reveal the beating stick and get stuck into it. Once he is on the ground begging for mercy, position the camera and start recording you beating the -blam!- out of the -blam!-. Then slap your -blam!- and send her flyin outta your house and mail her the tape. That'll teach her.
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  • Leave and tell her you need sometime to think. if she ever calls you or begs for forgivness then youill know she wants you as opposed to the guy she had that fling with
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Stalking Puma [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] SadBloke read your subject line and listen to what you typed.[/quote] How do you listen to pixels?[/quote] good point.
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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] SadBloke read your subject line and listen to what you typed.[/quote] How do you listen to pixels?
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  • Sadbloke STFU!!!! Rabid take Steels advice, it is what I would have said and it is the smartest thing to do. -T ;-) [Edited on 3/22/2005 10:29:29 PM]
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