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#Halo

9/16/2008 4:57:56 AM
330

Murphy's Laws of Halo (+85 laws so far)

[quote][url]http://www.murphys-laws.com/[/url][/quote] The above link is to the webiste of murphy's laws. If you do not know of Murhpy's Laws, I recommend checking out the site before continuing. What I would like to do is create a list of Murphy's Laws of Halo. Make your posts and I will add the best to the list. First, I shall post the fundamental law of halo. [b][u]NOTE:[/u][/b]i've been fixing some grammatical issues with some of the laws on the list for better clarity. [b]Helpful tip for navigating through the pages[/b] As the number of pages of this thread increase i decided to show people an easier way to navigate through the pages. The URL for the following pages will appear as follows: http://www.bungie.net/Forums/posts.aspx?postID=26152189&viewreplies=true&postRepeater1-p=2 The last number in the URL is the page number for this thread. if you want to get to a thread faster, just delete the number from the URL and enter the number of the desired page. This will make things a lot easier as the length of this thread continues to increase. [quote][b]Murphy's Fundamental Law of Halo:[/b] Blame Stosh[/quote] -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [u]Top Ten[/u](work in progress) 49. Pics or it didn't happen 19. Leave the gaurdiance alone. 56. Even when there's a search bar no one use's it!!! 57. No matter what what weapon you pick up, your enemy will pick up it's counter. 33. never underestimate the power of the traffic cone 66. no matter how far away you are from the other team when you get sniped, a ten-year-old will appear out of no where and start tea-bagging you and screaming "THAT'S RIGHT BI***!" 79. KEEP IT CLEAN -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1. Friendly fire isn't. 2. A marine who can frag you, will frag you. 3. If it has a head, it is going to die. 4.Just because someone betrays you doesn't always mean you should boot them, usually. 5. Master Chief wins. Always.... 5. Betraying someone always results in a ban, unless it was on purpose. 5.Just beacause it's a grunt, doesn't mean it wont kill you. 6. If there are 3 laws numbered #5, choose the best one for the situation at hand. 7. A grenade that doesn't kill the enemy in one hit will kill you instantly. 8. if it has a gun, it will shoot you. no exceptions. 9. Katana proof vests aren't 10. just because its a BR, doesn't mean it needs to be fixed 11. rule #10 is void whenever it is convienent 12: New updates generate new problems 13. You are not Master Chief. 14. If at first you don't succeed, call in a Scarab. 15. If you can't remember, the Rocket launcher is pointed towards you. 16. Murphy was a grunt. 17. If your only hope is a bubble shield then you're screwed. 18. When worse comes to worse, you're screwed. 19. Leave the gaurdiance alone. 20. If the match is close, you will almost ALWAYS falter in the last 10 seconds of the match. It doesn't matter what side you are on. you will either have the game-losing death, or they will have the game-winning mishap. 21. The only thing deadlier than the enemy is a marine with a rocket. 22. The terms "Protective Armor" and "mongoose" are mutually exclusive. 23. If you're close enough to actually hear a scorpion battle tank while you are in combat, but you're not part of the crew, you're too close. 24. Just because you have nearly impenetrable body armor and a hard-ass Elite helmet, doesn't mean you don't have exposed areas. 25. If a marine is driving, you're already dead. 26. If you know someone who tortures animals and wets the bed, he is either a serial killer or he works for Bungie Studios. 27. If anything can be romoved from the game, it will. 28. Trying to kill an enemy with fusion coils kills you instead. 29. If you have a sniper you will always get attacked by a scorpion tank, even on Guardian. 30. There will always be a team mate to run in front of your spartan laser. 31. Marines have horrible aim against enemies, though their hit percentage against you goes up 2000% when you are almost at a checkpoint. 32. If you don't know how you died, it was a marine. 33. never underestimate the power of the traffic cone 34. There will be grenade spamming on Snowbound. 35. If you spawn in the wrong spot on Valhalla you will get betrayed for the sniper rifle. 36. Banadu is not an Island you wish to vacation on 37. Tea bagging is not associated with a liqued beverage 38. If you can hear the person screaming at you, you're aiming at the wrong person. 39. "Pro" weapons aren't. 40. If Some One Screams "IM A CHARGING MEH LAZER" some ones gonna Die.. 41. If one of your allies screams "LEROY JENKINS!" you'll have an amazing save film. 42. Just because you can grab the sniper rifle, doesn't mean you should 43. Not everyone who beats you is modding. 44. Your enemies will always be able to jump over both of your point-blank rockets, but kill you with a single rocket from half way across the map. 45. Whenever a Ban becomes completely defined, some damn fool discovers something which either abolishes the Ban or expands it beyond recognition (stosh...). 46. Your gun always jams. 47. Frags will never pass through shield doors. 48. You will always waste your frags on shield doors, regardless of the above rule. 49. Pics or it didnt happen 50. If your gonna spawn on Standoff, it's gonna be right in the path of that warthog circling your base 51. Snipers blend in on ValHalla, no matter what color their armor is. Always 52. If you decide to drive the Warthog, someone on the enemy will decide to pick up the laser 53. Don't mess with Guilty Spark 54. on guardian, there is always an invisible guy with a shotgun around every corner. 55. If you're playing Halo, you're most likely to get pissed. 56. Even when there's a search bar no one use's it!!! 57. No matter what what weapon you pick up, your enemy will pick up it's counter. 58. You will always have to reload twice with either the rockets or the sniper rifle. 59. Chopper always wins at bumper cars. 60. The cone is more diabolical than the other team. 61. The radio dosen't work in ANY of the warthogs. 62. The more numbers in the screen name, the more annoying the player. 63. The more X's in the screen name, the more annoying the player. 64. Defending excessive numbers or X's in your screen name is always epic fail. 65. The person you insult in the lobby is the person who owns you in the game. 66. no matter how far away you are from the other team when you get sniped, a ten-year-old will appear out of no where and start tea-bagging you and screaming "THAT'S RIGHT BI***!" 67. The Magnum in Halo 3 is not why you bought this game 68. Lolspeak is never acceptable. unless ur on teh bungie.netz 69. Never make your service tag have the number 69 in it. 70. When playing with people better than you, you always say "man i'm on a bad day." 71. Laws like these will always happen because someone pointed them out. 72. You're not THAT invisible. 73. In an MLG match...EVERYONE gets an assassination. 74. You will NEVER see the pink mist until it gets you. 75. The Recticle DOES NOT need to be red for someone with the hammer to kill you. 76. When you're about to get an Overkill Extermination, you will be betrayed. 77. Looking at your team mates might seem like a betrayal threat. 78. No one likes your music 79. KEEP IT CLEAN 80. All grade four officers in the Pre and Post game lobby are rendered as boosters by their peers. 81. If you have a shotgun, the guy with the Spike Mauler will ALWAYS kill you. Even on maps without maulers. 82. Drifting in the warthog on Standoff is a form of HLG. 83. The kid with dual spikers most likely has down syndrome. 84. If you cant find any of your enemies on a map, there not HLG, your just stupid. 85. Never doubt the coloured text. NEVER!!! 86. if your GT has to do with taccos, your most likely cool 87. Ricochets are still bullets 88. If you're playing halo online, you WILL face someone with weed as their symbol. Always. [Edited on 09.19.2008 6:45 PM PDT]
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  • If you get a choice between marines and rocks, choose rocks.
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  • If you have rockets or a laser, your teammate will most likely throw a bubble shield in front of you when your about to fire [Edited on 01.24.2009 4:12 AM PST]
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  • If you dont camp other people sure as hell will
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  • An New Warthog will always be driven solo by allies.
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  • People on this forum can't spell very well...
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  • Anything that CAN kill you, WILL F you up! [Edited on 01.24.2009 4:10 AM PST]
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  • Getting garbage teammates is directly proportional to how close you are to a rank up. There is no such thing as a foolproof strategy because fools are so ingenious. When forging with anyone, they will always screw your map up, but you won't realize it until you are almost done. No matter how close you are to finishing the annual vidmaster, someome in your party will fall through a hole. All good things come to those who wait, but wait too long and some n00b will take your sniper/rockets/laser and be absolutely terrible with it. The skill required to use any weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the player using it. Big weapon = sniper bait. When in 10x zoom, dont forget about the enemy who is 10 feet away with a shotgun. Never, ever rush a Bubble Shield without a shotgun. When in a shotgun standoff, the other guy always wins. When you survive extraordinary things, it will be the little things that kill you. [Edited on 01.24.2009 4:02 AM PST]
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  • Love reading this.
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  • 43 is my favorite.
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  • If your forging with 10yr olds you WILL be splattered by a tank. even on guardian.
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  • Not every general Bought their level 50... But some do.
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  • Christmas tree sticky grunt's always lose
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  • "The material guns are made of (in H3)are better than material that's used for Mjolnir Armor." I.e: I shoot someone with a sniper from behind but the gun on his/her back softens the shot when it's in the way. But when you get a head shot on one person that bullet passes throgh the shield, armor, skull and the exit wound would also have to include going through the brain, skull, armor and into the next person's shield armor then head.
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  • No matter how close you are, how soon you shoot, or how often you shoot, you will always lose in a shotgun v shotgun play-off.
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  • You will be betrayed before achieving the Perfection medal.
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  • Trying to get acheivements NEVER works
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  • Bungie giveth and Bungie taketh away.
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  • the word turret will always be spelled incorrectly ie. turrent
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  • If you hear the words, "Killing Spree!" expect to die. You know someone is going to spawn on top of you while your shields are down, or a friendly grenade accidentaly thrown to "help" will do the same job.
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  • Here is are some more Just because your brother promised not to punch you while playing halo together does not mean he has any intention of keeping his promise. Your mom will always call for bedtime durring the middle of a game. If you get standoff, you have already lost. If you do well at the beginning, you will suck at the end. Someone will always survive your attempt to fourshot them, then kill you with three shots. A VIP with a magnum is as good as dead. On Valhalla, the enemy will always get their banshee back faster. Ranked game series start out so-so, then they get worse with every one you play. If you get an objective game on the pit, you have already lost. If you do not know what the double XP weekend is, it is probably team snipers.
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  • I could have sworn I've posted here before.
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  • Diarrhea is [i]never[/i] planned. You may think that that has nothing to do with Halo, but you'd be wrong.
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  • lol these should be in a book :)
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  • mines nevr rlly seem to work out as planned
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  • Lag never works to your advantage
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  • 47. Frags will never pass through shield doors. I have video evidence that they can... =P
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