So I was playing Rocket Race on a bright Sunday afternoon. It was a beautiful day and my friends wanted to play basketball. I know right, what noobs. You'll never be MLG if thats what you do with your spare time. So I went into Rocket Race and closed the blinds. I was busy shooting rockets at my teammate (lolololololololololol) when the most magical thing happened.
It fluttered through my headset like the aroma of fresh baked cookies from my easy bake over. I heard it and I melted. The most beautiful thing anyone could ever imagine. It was the unmistakable voice of a human female. I'll never forget those words she said "Hey you -blam!- -blam!-. Stop shooting me and get on the Mongoose." Mankind at its most beautiful.
I was awestruck. A girl playing Halo. I couldn't wrap my feeble mind around this concept. A girl? A person lacking the male reproductive organ? Maybe even playing naked with her voluptious breasts out in the open? The thoughts drove me wild. I couldn't contain myself any more.
I quickly apologized for my actions and sent her a friend request. We continued to play and I found out her name was Sammy. What a beautiful name for a beautiful girl. We played Rocket Race and Custom games. It was amazing. I found out that she too turned down the oppritunity to play basketball and that just excited me even more.
Then the time came. My mother broke my heart by telling me I had to go to the proctologist for my monthly exam. I knew I would have to leave the love of my life. It was now or never. I let her hear what I felt in my heart. At the end I asked for her hand in marriage.
She was silent for a moment and then it came. Like a icy dagger through me heart "wtf? No way" I could barely hold back the tears. I asked for a reason. She replied with "I like girls."
What? Are you serious? There was no way this enchanting young woman could be a -blam!-? I asked in the nicest way I could think of "So you're a carpet muncher?" Her laugh cut through me and destroyed my ability to love. When she finally stopped laughing she broke my heart one more time with her final words.
"No you moron. I'm a boy. I'm only 9."
The lesson here is, don't trust anyone on the internet. I have loved and lost. It pains me every day since. Please people, don't let this happen to you.
-
lulzfest!
-
I had a good day... This made it better ^_^
-
LOL! How do you play Rocket Race to get better for MLG? Wow this guy is hilarious!
-
Well... That made my day =P
-
ROFL!!! the proctologist part made me LOL! please make another story soon!
-
So good.
-
[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Arbiter 617 You shoulda played basketball.[/quote] There's a hoop on Lockout.
-
LMAO good thread
-
Lmao unluckey.
-
apart from the fact that you | LIKE | little boys i thought it was pretty funny
-
[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Gxas lol, I guess you don't realize that I can't see people through my computer like you must be able to. Text chatting doesn't let me hear the voice of the person I'm talking to. [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Ascetic A37 ... How retarded could people get...?[/quote][/quote] I thought it was obviously a joke to people with over an IQ of 10. However, the aforementioned statement still remains a fact.
-
MAI ROFLWAFFLE GEOZ SIZL SIZL SIZL SIZL SIZL SIZL SIZL SIZL SIZL SIZL hilarious
-
lol, I guess you don't realize that I can't see people through my computer like you must be able to. Text chatting doesn't let me hear the voice of the person I'm talking to. [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Ascetic A37 ... How retarded could people get...?[/quote]
-
You're annoying
-
[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Gxas This sucks if its true. I did something similar. I was playin WoW and helpin out this girl. We started chattin and really hit it off well. The next day I came on and she pst'd me. We chatted again and I found out that she wasn't 18 like I had assumed... ...she was 9... ...I cried... I'm over it now though.[/quote] ... How retarded could people get...?
-
This sucks if its true. I did something similar. I was playin WoW and helpin out this girl. We started chattin and really hit it off well. The next day I came on and she pst'd me. We chatted again and I found out that she wasn't 18 like I had assumed... ...she was 9... ...I cried... I'm over it now though.
-
[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] BlitzBladeX I think this rivals that of Naked Noob. Good job man.[/quote] That's what I said. QFT Naked Noob, make another one and we can make a comparison!
-
That's the 3rd time i've read it and i'm still rofl'ing my self silly. There needs to be more humor at bungie like this :D
-
[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] UnbarredPython This is sad. Not because he thought he found a girl playing Halo, but because she was most likely the closest he will ever come to a girlfriend, let alone marriage.[/quote] That was some comedy right there =] fereal
-
OMG,this IS epic,i say this thread is the most humorous thread ive ever seen i almost fell off my chair laughing as i read on.XD
-
You shoulda played basketball.
-
[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] NAKED N00B 14 I'm naked n00b and I approve this message.[/quote]\ hahahaha nice.
-
lmao..and the 9 year olds get mad when you ask if there chicks or dudes..
-
lol thats all i can say..oh my god that boy's voice must be very high if you thought it was a girl.
-
LLOOLOLOL Why'd he get reported??
-
This is pretty rare. 10 pages and very few flamers. One of the most epic posts in Bnet history.