Well, the temporary solution is simple. Just make sure you join in on an already-occurring raid instance so it doesn't make you host. Since you're not coordinating everyone's data or uploading gigs of data, it won't throttle you or max your upload bandwidth.
However, this won't fix the issue in Crucible matches, especially ToO that's coming up again...
After the most recent patch, I've started getting frequent "Contacting Destiny servers" and disconnect messages. This is accompanied by a slowdown of my internet throughout the house (0.75Mb down/0.15 up), so I've been calling our ISP's technical support for the past week. We have only tested whether 1) the hardware has issues or 2) packets are being lost. We haven't found any issues with the router or network. However, unplugging the power to the modem and replugging it seems to fix the issue, so we replaced it with a brand new modem. The new one still has the same issue.
I thought it was just coincidence that I was getting disconnected every time I loaded up Destiny. However, I just saw this post on Reddit [url]https://www.reddit.com/r/DestinyTheGame/comments/39aln6/anybody_else_getting_a_really_bad_connection/[/url]. Then I realized that the issue is related: Booting up Destiny and connecting to other players (tower, reef, raid, etc) triggers an automatic throttle from the ISP. I never had issues with my internet until the recent patch, and I just tested it a dozen times at random intervals over the past 4 hours (making sure to contact tech support to see if they are seeing the same behavior I'm seeing). Turning on the PS4 is fine, but as soon as I match up with any person in Destiny, it triggers an automated throttle or my modem is rejected from service.
Whatever the patch added to keep a constant re-connect state seems to tripping a flag at the ISP. I'm on the phone with them again to see what we can do for my account to stop the throttle from being triggered.
I would appreciate it if Bungie starts looking into these claims rather than telling us to buy new hardware, contact our ISP, or telling us to change our provider. From what I've read on both forums, it seems to be affecting Time Warner Cable, Comcast, and Verizon customers.