You don't owe him shit, man. You don't want to see him? Don't. It doesn't sound like he deserves to see you, and you're not responsible for what he does.

Hey random. I went through 9 years of abuse from my Biological father. He was in the Marine corp and I didn't even meet him until I was 4, he was deployed all 4 of those years. When he came home he was a task master, and an abuser. I witnessed him pound my mothers head into the ground cracking her skull. I have had my nose broken by him, and I have been lifted by the hair on my head and thrown into walls. I received endless verbal abuse as well. It wasn't until my father finally hurt my sister when she was 10 that my mother divorced him. She then married another man who was also abusive. He was more of the mental abuser. He once broke a boat paddle over my back, but other than that he would just poke his finger into my chest and scream. After 4 years my mother divorced him as well. Now, I am 25, going on 26. After 13 years of abuse by two different men you would think I would hate them. I can tell you that today, I understand them. My father was physically and sexually abused as a child, something that crippled him when it came social interaction and healthy relationships. Then you add on top of this military service in one of the worst wars our country has seen, the Gulf war, my dad has Gulf war syndrome, and extreme PTSD do to what he saw and experienced. These factors contributed to a recipe for disaster. I came to find out years later that my mother had been cheating on my father the entire time he was overseas fighting for his country. The already terrible trauma of war and then adding a women you loved cheating on you would be devastating for any man. Now that I am older, I am able to better look back, and understand. It wasn't my fault, and it wasn't my fathers fault for doing the things he did. The choice was his, however, he was a hurt person an he had no way of controlling himself. I wish I had some inspiring revelation to share, but I don't. All I can say is forgive, and move on. Their is always factors you are not aware of, does it make it ok, no, but acknowledging this allows for healing. Me and my father don't have the best relationship today. However it is far greater then it was before. We can now talk without him becoming angry for no reason. He in a way has apologized for the past, I don't expect to receive a full list apology, but knowing he regrets it all is enough for me. tldr; Sometimes we need to forgive those that hurt us, and give them a chance to make amends.

Jesus ._. I'm sorry to hear that... [quote] I hear that I'm responsible for my biological father trying to kill himself? [/quote] You aren't, even if that is what he says. It sounds an awful lot like emotional blackmail/manipulation which is just about the most disgusting thing a parent can do to their child, short of physical abuse. What you could do is say that you might see him, but just not yet. Use delaying tactics until you are happy enough to meet with him, either way it would buy you some time and breathing space. I have to do the same shit with my mum, find reasons to not see her just yet, 'maybe soon', I'm busy with school right now, maybe in the holidays etc etc. Eventually you do have to see them, well not literally but it tends to be the right thing to do. Yeah... just tell him that you can't see him right now, but that you will try to soon. Or something along those lines.

You're not responsible for him tryin to kill himself. That's [i]his[/i] choice and you have no "duty" to convince him not to. Whether that be with words or actions. If you're not ready tell him so and tell him why. Given that he beat you and your family he doesn't deserve to be part of it.

Speak with him over the phone?