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9/26/2005 7:49:37 AM
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Skippy's List: 213 things Skippy can no longer do in the U.S. Military

[url=http://www.skippyslist.com/skippylist.html]Linky[/url] Funny stuff. I especially love number 100. [quote]#100. Claymore mines are not filled with yummy candy, and it is wrong to tell new soldiers that they are.[/quote] Classic. --Fused--
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  • very amusing

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  • That was sweet.

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  • 0
    I think I read this a long time ago. There was one where it said... [i]When you return to the civilian world, pain is not weakness leaving the body it's just pain[/i]

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  • HOLY S***!!!! LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is this [b] real [/b] ?!?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  • [quote] 31. Not allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of my actions. 32. Not allowed to let sock puppets take command of my post. [/quote] I thought these were hilarious! There are plenty more I liked, but I couldnt be bother me arse to find them. Suffice it to say that it was all the weird ones, like those. ^^^

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  • i wonder how he found out about #5.... did he try?

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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] goweb #22 is probably more of a life-saver than anything.[/quote] Well not if you want to die 33 ways before hitting the ground. Edit: Your quoting system is buggered up. [Edited on 9/26/2005]

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  • #22 is probably more of a life-saver than anything.

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  • You should really send those in to the site. I can't believe you tried to ship someones Gator out.

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  • Okay...um...I'm not going to say anything about joining the military, and I hope this thread doesn't go in that direction. So...I'm going to add some of the stupid things we do at work. [*]Spent about a week putting kiwi in commonly handled places like doorknobs, handles, the liner on berets. [*]Make fake license plates that are quite offensive and then ride with the person on the way to lunch. [*]Place our buddy's [url=http://www.deere.com/en_US/ProductCatalog/GC/category/printableversion/GC_UV_printableVersion.html]Gator[/url] on top of shop sets on deployment. I'll post more later when I think of more.

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  • i like 33 & 34 33. Not allowed to chew gum at formation, unless I brought enough for everybody. 34. (Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I *did* bring enough for everybody.

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  • I wish I would have been able to sign up for one of those training things when I lived next to Fort Polk. I was too young. I liked the one where he shot at the generals helecopter in a training exercise. I guess it was one of those laser tag type things and he got credit for shooting down his generals helicopter. That's good stuff. Reading the list that readers made was fun too. I like the one where they used blank rounds with muzzle loaded cleaning rods in their m16 to shoot squirrels harpoon style.

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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] kd5shw That made me think about the training missions on full spectrum warrior. I can just imagine them firing blank rounds from their MILES system and skippy is like, "Oops I give up."[/quote] I've only been on one training exercise were I was able to play OPFOR. We where supposed to be locals that come across some aircraft refueling. It was bad enough without any defects because they gave us about four times the blank ammo than the guys doing the actual "mission". It was hilarious. [Edited on 9/26/2005]

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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] impurity [quote]170. Not allowed to “defect” to OPFOR during training missions.[/quote] [/quote] That made me think about the training missions on full spectrum warrior. I can just imagine them firing blank rounds from their MILES system and skippy is like, "Oops I give up."

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  • [quote]170. Not allowed to “defect” to OPFOR during training missions.[/quote] That one makes me wish I had the opportunity. I never get to do anything fun. [quote]189. Do not dare SERE graduates to eat bugs. They will always do it.[/quote] Tru7h. That poor, poor wasp. Spicy.

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  • i liked #100 too. it was better than most lists.

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  • Number of times I laughed: 2 Better then normal. >> Kritz

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  • 139. Must not teach interpreters how to make "MRE" bombs. [b]If you ave never made an MRE bomb you don't know what you are missing. Go to an army surplus store and get some MRE's and glass bottles [i]they have to be glass[/i]. PM me and I'll tell you how to make one.[/b] 152. The following items do not exist: Keys to the Drop Zone, A box of grid squares, blinker fluid, winter air for tires, canopy lights, or Chem-Light ® batteries. [b]RvB anyone[/b] 181. Pokémon® trainer is not an MOS. Classic. [Edited on 9/26/2005]

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  • 20. Must not taunt the French any more. 21. Must attempt to not antagonize SAS. 22. Must never call an SAS a “Wanker”. 29. The Irish MPs are not after “Me frosted lucky charms”. 35. Not allowed to sing “High Speed Dirt” by Megadeth during airborne operations. (“See the earth below/Soon to make a crater/Blue sky, black death, I'm off to meet my maker”) 76. "Teddy Bear, Teddy bear, turn around" is *not* a cadence. [b]You would be surprised how many songs make a good cadence. Old McDonald had a farm can be said to a military cadence tune[/b] 77. The MP checkpoint is not an Imperial Stormtrooper roadblock, so I should not tell them "You don't need to see my identification, these are not the droids you are looking for." [Edited on 9/26/2005]

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  • Awesome.

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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] verbiage Is it a -blam!- guy or a girl...?[/quote] Who cares? It's funny.... --Fused--

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  • Is it a -blam!- guy or a girl...?

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