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1/25/2005 8:57:56 PM
68
Flood - I need your help!
I just got my first love letter in a while - and as usual it was delivered to me via a 'friend'. To quote the letter:
[quote]My name is Jennifer, I hope you know. [well, I do now - whoever you are] I just wanted to tell you I'm madly in love with you. I miss you so much [miss? I don't even know her], I can't live without you. So I gave this note to my friends to give to you...
[then, in large, bold letters]
I [heart] U!!
Love,
Jennifer
P.S. - If you wanna get to know me better, call me at ***-****, but if you don't like me don't call.
[/quote]
Ah. Teenage love. Such a precious thing. Now here's where the flood comes in - I would like to hold a little brainstorming session to figure out how to most humorously respond to this girl. Anything goes, so long as it's legal.
My first idea: Write a "fill-in-the-blank" official return letter from my "Public Representative" in type. Make it seem long and legal, such as that "he recognizes your interest. If you intend to proceed further please resubmit a resume complete with photo ID, measurements, your interests, goals, and any previous references you may have." Have everything in type except her name, and her place "in line" - which is hand-written in.
Any other ideas welcome.
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Hey, calm down.
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You dont say!
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ImJustMe [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] buffalo wing [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] eliteskull94 [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ImJustMe You are the crulest person I have ever had the misfortune to meet. I hope you die in animl pheasies. You absolutly sicken me to the core. I dont even belive this. How can anyone like you. You seem like such an ass. A funny ass but an ass none of the less. Which should make women look at you as a level above nothing obseravable.[/quote] Jennifer? Is that you?![/quote] Seems like we might have a little meeting on our hands.[/quote] No I dont live anywhere near this creep and im 17. No way in hell would I be atracted to anyone this damn full of themselves. His ego must be the size of a rather large sperm whale.[/quote] Wow, she [i]is[/i] pissed.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] buffalo wing [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] eliteskull94 [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ImJustMe You are the crulest person I have ever had the misfortune to meet. I hope you die in animl pheasies. You absolutly sicken me to the core. I dont even belive this. How can anyone like you. You seem like such an ass. A funny ass but an ass none of the less. Which should make women look at you as a level above nothing obseravable.[/quote] Jennifer? Is that you?![/quote] Seems like we might have a little meeting on our hands.[/quote] No I dont live anywhere near this creep and im 17. No way in hell would I be atracted to anyone this damn full of themselves. His ego must be the size of a rather large sperm whale.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] eliteskull94 [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ImJustMe You are the crulest person I have ever had the misfortune to meet. I hope you die in animl pheasies. You absolutly sicken me to the core. I dont even belive this. How can anyone like you. You seem like such an ass. A funny ass but an ass none of the less. Which should make women look at you as a level above nothing obseravable.[/quote] Jennifer? Is that you?![/quote] Seems like we might have a little meeting on our hands.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ImJustMe You are the crulest person I have ever had the misfortune to meet. I hope you die in animl pheasies. You absolutly sicken me to the core. I dont even belive this. How can anyone like you. You seem like such an ass. A funny ass but an ass none of the less. Which should make women look at you as a level above nothing obseravable.[/quote] Jennifer? Is that you?!
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Kroenen Obbi could be 30 years old for all we know.[/quote] No, he's 19 or so. He even showed a picture of himself awhile back (with clothes).
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Grr friggle smiggle. i can't see the stupid posts.
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aaah! invisiposts!
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ImJustMe You confuse me. Wow it must be hard to [b] pretent [/b] your such an idiot. Oh wait your not pretending are you. Hmm your about on the same level as him now.[/quote]
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ImJustMe You confuse me. Wow it must be hard to pretent your such an idiot. Oh wait your not pretending are you. Hmm your about on the same level as him now.[/quote]01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 01110011 00100000 01100111 01101111 01101111 01100100 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110000 01110010 01101111 01100010 01100001 01100010 01101100 01111001 00100000 01110111 01101111 01110101 01101100 01100100 00100000 01101010 01110101 01110011 01110100 00100000 01100110 01101100 01100001 01101101 01100101 00100000 01110101 01110011 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 00100000 01110111 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01110111 01100101 00100000 01110011 01100001 01101001 01100100 00100000 01100001 01101110 01111001 01110111 01100001 01111001 00101110 [Edited on 1/25/2005 6:39:27 PM]
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Halifax [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Kroenen Obbi could be 30 years old for all we know.[/quote] And he could be lying about the girl too. [/quote] [i] girl [/i]
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Kroenen Obbi could be 30 years old for all we know.[/quote] And he could be lying about the girl too.
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You confuse me. Wow it must be hard to pretent your such an idiot. Oh wait your not pretending are you. Hmm your about on the same level as him now. [Edited on 1/25/2005 6:33:13 PM]
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ðcherryð [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ImJustMe You are the crulest person I have ever had the misfortune to meet. I hope you die in animl pheasies. You absolutly sicken me to the core. I dont even belive this. How can anyone like you. You seem like such an ass. A funny ass but an ass none of the less. Which should make women look at you as a level above nothing obseravable.[/quote] Thats a good line to tell her! sorry, i can never resist things like that *hangs head in shame* i have a problem[/quote]yeh you know i think we have a winner,hey obbie send her this one /\
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ImJustMe You are the crulest person I have ever had the misfortune to meet. I hope you die in animl pheasies. You absolutly sicken me to the core. I dont even belive this. How can anyone like you. You seem like such an ass. A funny ass but an ass none of the less. Which should make women look at you as a level above nothing obseravable.[/quote] Thats a good line to tell her! sorry, i can never resist things like that *hangs head in shame* i have a problem
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Obbi could be 30 years old for all we know.
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No Obbi is a -blam!- Jerk and nothing more. He dosnt care what or how this girl feels. -blam!- -blam!-. Grr people like you just piss me off.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ImJustMe You are the crulest person I have ever had the misfortune to meet. I hope you die in animl pheasies. You absolutly sicken me to the core. I dont even belive this. How can anyone like you. You seem like such an ass. A funny ass but an ass none of the less. Which should make women look at you as a level above nothing obseravable.[/quote] Money. Some girls will forgive a guy for anything he did...as long as he is rich. And generous.
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You are the crulest person I have ever had the misfortune to meet. I hope you die in animl pheasies. You absolutly sicken me to the core. I dont even belive this. How can anyone like you. You seem like such an ass. A funny ass but an ass none of the less. Which should make women look at you as a level above nothing obseravable.
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Dont listen to these other people,send her the headless bird man!!!!
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Ask her if she digs paedophyles
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Or, show her this forum thread.
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Ask if she would be willing to put on a suit of MJOLNIR and let you call her "chief".
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send her a mail bomb or if you know where she lives put a decapitated bird in her mailbox. [Edited on 1/25/2005 6:10:36 PM]
