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11/24/2014 10:32:01 PM
4

So I Deleted A Character

For those of you who are willing to endure this story of stupidity, obsession, redundancy, and questionable sexuality, I adore you all. It all starts with a joke that my close friends share. Whenever we are about to do something extremely difficult or something when the odds are totally against us, we will proclaim that we will be gay upon completing said task. We are almost never successful in these tasks, so we save the claim for extreme circumstances. I made this statement about a dice roll while playing a board game with my girlfriend, and needless to say I was gay afterwards. Now, back to the real story... I play destiny too much. Way too much. I've had three 30's for awhile now, and all the exotics and raid weapons a man could ever need, except one. The Gjallarhorn. I missed this baby the week that pedophile Xur was selling it in the tower due to the fact that I had no idea the potential the weapon held. If been running the nightfall and hard raid three times a week in attempt to pick this bad boy up, but it eluded me no matter how hard I tried. After being cheated out of the exotic horn at every opportunity, I decided that it would take something drastic to procure my trophy; I would delete one of my thirties to get another shot at the nightfall. Now this may seem too drastic to some, deleting a character and grinding through story missions for about 10 hours for a CHANCE at a single piece of gear, but I was desperate to reclaim my sexuality. So I did just that, deleted my hunter and started anew. After my hunter once again hit the highest rank, I invited my girl, and dawned my raid gear for one last shot at the unknown rewards of the nightfall strike. After killing what seemed like endless vandals, shanks, and captains, and reviving my girl countless times, I found myself staring at Sepiks Prime through the sight of my Patience and Time. Six magazines later and he was spinning down into a pile of purple rubble, and that's when my heart stopped. I tucked my chin towards my chest, unable to bare the sight of what was about to happen. I peeked up, like a shameful child looking at a nice rack on late night tv for the first time. That's when I saw it. The glorious golden text that read Gjallarhorn, sitting right next to my name. "I'M NOT GAY! I AM NOT GAY! I AM NOT F*CKING GAY!" I exclaimed. I sorta feel sorry for the random friend that had joined my lobby. He must've been extremely weirded out my my girlfriend and I proclaiming my heterosexuality, but I was just so happy. I immediately equipped my war prize, and my girl said that now she wanted to give the hard raid a go in attempt to get some gauntlets for her hunter, and I joyfully accepted as I had a oracle checkpoint ready to go. To keep it short, she unfortunately didn't get anything, but I received the Fatebringer, which was second in my list to the G-horn. I also got four chests in the span of about fifteen minutes that all contained 10+ materials as well as a few blue engrams. Overall it was totally worth the grind to reclaim my sexuality and my prized Gjallarhorn, and I'd say that if you have the time to kill, don't be afraid to re-roll one of your characters! (Also please forgive me if my little gayness joke with my friends offends you)
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