I got my dog when I was about ten years old. We found her as a little runaway, she was already house trained. She was a pardi poodle (mostly) with some other stuff mixed in. We soon found out why she was a runaway: she ALWAYS wanted to escape the yard! She would dig, run for open doors, whatever it took to get out and explore the neighborhood. We had a run down fence in several spots and realized one time she was climbing onto our AC and jumping through a hole in the fence way off of the ground to the neighbor's yard where she could dig out. She was a good sport once we found her, she'd run up to the car, tongue lolling out, sometimes with animal poop all over her back (lol). The running nature eventually passed out of her almost entirely and she became trustworthy enough to hang out in the front yard without a leash. She was a fantastic dog, always good for a laugh, although she had sour moods sometimes. (Her sighs when someone would sit in a chair next to her while she was resting were legendary.) I remember best how on Saturday mornings when I would sleep in with my door shut sometimes it would be getting late and my family would open up the door. She was an alarm clock, bounding in and licking me until I would get out of bed. Eventually she got sick. We didn't know what it was. She stayed at the vets for a little while, and when it looked bad, I remember that visit. I held her, sick and shaking and weak, in my lap. I remember that last little lick on my cheek, feeble and tremulous, as well as I remember any feeling in this life. I went home and cried for a long time. She died that night. I can't write that without fighting back the tears, even though it was years ago. I feel your pain. It will get better... your dog had a life well lived. Most of them with good owners do.

I've lost 3 dogs before, as well as a few birds and several cats. 'My' first dog was a mid-sized mutt that was in the family longer than I was. We lost her suddenly to an attack by a gang of attack dogs that got loose from a neighbor's yard. She was ripped to shreds, but since I was only eight so my parents didn't allow me to see her before she was put finally down. Our next dog was an old beagle we got when I was about 11. We had him for about three years before he developed muscular distrophy, and we put him down when it became apparent that he was in too much pain. Our last dog was a Pitt Bull, and she was probably the sweetest dog I had ever known. Unfortunately we had to move after a while, and couldn't take her with us so we left her with an elderly couple in the next town over. She's probably still alive and happy though. We've lost even more cats to various ailments, since my grandparents were so keen on taking in old strays. The three we have currently are doing well though.

I'm sorry for your loss. I went through something similar recently, but there was no decline, only the sudden end... but I know how you feel. Really the best thing you can do is let it out in any way that works for you, and be thankful for the time you were able to spend with your friend.

#Support

I know what you are going through. When I was 5 or 6, we got a dog. We think she was a golden Retriever/Lab/Collie mix. She was the best dog I had ever known. When we came back from a beach trip, we saw that she was in so much pain she could hardly even move. Dad took her to the vet, and she had really bad cancer. We had to put her down. We had her 10 years...

I'm sorry to hear that man, she seems like she was a great dog. Dogs can be such a pivotal part of your life, it's hard to just replace it. If nothing else, I'm glad that she was happy up until the end. People are weird in that they don't like applying anthropomorphic (yes, it has a psychological meaning, it's not a furry thing) behaviors to dogs, but they are just as natural at exhibiting emotions as humans are, which is why we get along so well I imagine. Some people even go so far to say that dogs just don't experience emotions at all, I don't get it. Tangent aside.. My dog hasn't died, but she was stolen a couple years ago. When I finally got her back, she was malnourished and was missing some teeth. That much was pretty hard for me, I can't imagine what it'll be like when she passes.