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originally posted in:NMPA
Edited by GT Stryker: 3/16/2013 8:59:54 PM
108

We Should Ban Water.

[b]ATTENTION:[/b] It is imperative that you heed this warning. The NMPA has been notified of water weaponization systems as seen here: [url=http://cdn.theatlanticwire.com/img/upload/2012/04/27/RTR2L4N3/large.jpg]"Water Guns."[/url] As well as this weapon intended for splash damage: [url=http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_r7wwW-oYD6Q/Srg4h3op2LI/AAAAAAAACPs/041BcOj1R_E/s400/DSCN3577.JPG]"Water Balloons."[/url] For eye protection, seek these devices: [url=http://www.swimminglessons.com.sg/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/goggles.jpg]"Goggles."[/url] Brought to you from NMPA member: [b]Murcielago.[/b] Tread carefully. The NMPA is working to classify these as Weapons of Mass Destruction (WMDs), where they belong. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Think about it, have you seen the connection between water and death? Here are some facts for you [created via collaboration]: [spoiler][quote]1. 100% of people drink water before death 2. 100% of drowning incidents involve water 3. 100% of people who die have water inside of them 4. Thieves, assassins, murderers, gang members all at one point drank water. It is probable that they do so every single day! 5.It is possible to be burnt with steam, or slip and injure yourself in water's solid state. [/quote] [/spoiler] Isn't it clear by now? Water is a massive enemy against humankind, and we shouldn't, and [i]will not[/i] stand for this! [spoiler][url=http://parentjazz.wordpress.com/2008/01/08/ten-reasons-why-drinking-water-is-good-for-you/]Idiotic Article[/url] People are so blind to the truth, articles like this are being made! This is what the big corporations and their so-called,"Scientists," would have us believe! [/spoiler] Evidently, water goes hand-in-hand with death. It's already covered approx. 70% of the Earth's surface, it's everywhere and it must be stopped! [b]It is a tool used for killing, and no good can come of it![/b] We must end the hydrogen and oxygen atoms' evil alliance, before it's too late! [b]UPDATE:[/b] [quote]This would've been better if you said ban dihydrogen monoxide.[/quote] [quote]Yeah, that Dihydrogen Monoxide is lethal stuff.[/quote] These quotes are brought to you by, [b]Rockdale Rooster[/b], and [b]BSS Lazer[/b] (respectively). Dihydrogen Monoxide is a pseudonym for water, among other things. Here is a full list of it's alternate identities: [spoiler][quote][b]Other names[/b] Hydrogen oxide Dihydrogen monoxide (DHMO) Hydrogen monoxide Dihydrogen oxide Hydrogen hydroxide (HH or HOH) Hydric acid Hydrohydroxic acid Hydroxic acid Hydrol μ-Oxido dihydrogen [/quote] Taken from [url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Properties_of_water]a Wikipedia entry.[/url][/spoiler] -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My fellow NMPA member [[b]Murcielago[/b]] has gifted us with even more knowledge on this grave threat, here is what he had to say: [spoiler][quote]Water and dihydrogen monoxide are dangerous components to mankind. 100% of people die. What did those people have in common? They all drank dihydrogen monoxide and had water in their bodies. Water makes up 70% of the Earth's surface. It is only a matter of time before it tries to claim the rest. How many stories of polar ice caps melting do we need to hear about, before the threat of a watery invasion is taken seriously. Thieves, assassins, murderers, gang members all at one point drank water. Probably every day. We must also, limit all forms of water. How many people have been burned from steam? How many people have slipped on frozen water and seriously hurt their tushees? Water is a serious threat that need to be dealt with. NOW![/quote] Even more recently: [quote]-Death due to accidental inhalation of DHMO, even in small quantities. -Prolonged exposure to solid DHMO causes severe tissue damage. -Excessive ingestion produces a number of unpleasant though not typically life-threatening side-effects. -DHMO is a major component of acid rain. -Gaseous DHMO can cause severe burns. -Contributes to soil erosion. -Leads to corrosion and oxidation of many metals. -Contamination of electrical systems often causes short-circuits. -Exposure decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes. -Found in biopsies of pre-cancerous tumors and lesions. -Given to vicious dogs involved in recent deadly attacks. -Often associated with killer cyclones in the U.S. Midwest and elsewhere, and in hurricanes including deadly storms in Florida, New Orleans and other areas of the southeastern U.S. -Thermal variations in DHMO are a suspected contributor to the El Nino weather effect.[/quote] For more information: see[url=http://www.dhmo.org/facts.html] this website.[/url] [/spoiler] -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- [b]UPDATE 2:[/b] Our fellow man, [b]TheBiggerBang97[/b], has given us knowledge on some withdrawal symptoms for what he labels as,"aquaholics." [quote]You forgot to mention it's highly addictive. The withdrawal symptoms are so severe, that if an aquaholic goes more than 3 days without water, he DIES.[/quote] Thank you, [b]TheBiggerBang97.[/b] The entirety of the NMPA salutes you!

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