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2014-07-28T01:35:48Z

#Gallery

ChorrizoTapatio

ChorrizoTapatio

10/4/2012 1:10:04 AM
*The following story is a recent Sangheili bedtime story discovered by the UNSC through a communication interception after the events that took place on planet Reach. It is very...disturbing. From the looks of it,this story is told to young Sangheili children back on their homeworld before they sleep. You are to archive this and destroy it immediately.* >Beginning translation. . . >Translation complete. >Beginning, "The Little Sangheili That Could". . . There once was a warrior named Blargur. Blargur was a hardworking warrior but he had one huge flaw: he was the smallest warrior the Sangheili Elites had ever had. He was teased by the other warriors and by the leaders as well. He could barely lift an energy sword and could never shoot a plasma rifle accurately. He was so tiny that he was even assigned to work along side the grunts, who also made fun of him. Yes, in their eyes he was a pathetic warrior but now it was time to prove them all wrong. Blargur had been assigned to infiltrate a heretic city that the humans called, "New Alexandria" located on their planet "Reach". He was assigned to work with the grunts, as usual, to hold their ammunition and plasma grenades. He had also been given the duty of wearing a mysterious glowing vest that his leaders said would, "blow away" the enemies if the grunts around him weer to fall. He was convinced that it was just a teleportation device that would stun the demons. So Blargur was dropped of with the grunts but something went wrong, all of the other grunts had died from the fall! He was the only one left. "Yes!" He thought to himself, "Now I can prove that I am a great warrior!" So, off he strode into the city, weilding his plasma pistol and mini energy sword. The vest was only weighing him down so he decided to throw it down. A short while later he heard an explosion from that direction. He figured it was just the wind. He was met in the city by many enemy forces, but he was not scared. He just though to himself, "I think I can, I think I can!" and sure enough he was slaughtering all of the humans! He smiled the biggest smile he had ever smiled as all of his enemies fell before him, screaming and groaning in pain. He [i]was[/i] a great warrior after all! He continued into the city, slashing and shooting all before him thinking to himself, "I know I can, I know I can!". Soon enough, he had slain them all. He wiped the blood off his face and grinned, surely he would be able to kill the green demon that had slain his father. Eventually, he did and he returned home as the greatest warrior that ever lived. The end. >End Transmission.
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