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Xeroh

Xeroh

9/3/2005 5:47:54 AM
So, nice, easy, calm, silent. Sitting in the dark, just me and you kids out there. Everything is so peacefull for now, for me. The dark thoughts in my head hushed out by the smell of sweet grass and cookies. Possibly too calm, it worries me that im back to flaming up, othor than eating a apple or something healthy. Its bad, but keeps my mind off the worse things, I don't worry anymore, im safe in the house, safe in my so called room, safe in the forum, again. I'll have to stop this, for Naomi, I'll stop, cold turkey, its easy right? I mean, how could something so small be so addicting? I'll stop, and not give into tempation if there is any, I don't beleive people who say its hard to stop smoking. Nicorette, what a load of crap. Feeling depressed again, right after I finnished the last paragraph Kevin blew up my sence of peace and talked about how it won't work. He said he was just screwing with me, it just goes to prove im nothing to him. I shouldn't be this upset, he has a point. He is right. And I hate it. I can't let the world win, Im not going to give into addiction or suicide, with Kevin by my side or not.

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